Call it a dilemma, or a soul-searching condition. So on and so forth it may seem like, given the brevity of the situation, the fact stays that sooner or later the decision will have to be made, and it will all have to move on. But, back to the realty now where the dilemma rests.
It’s all the more challenging to reach a decision, particularly owing to the fact that there won’t be any more a shade to hide in the name of the big, fat auto-credited salary at the end of each month. Also this, in turn, would hit the periodically-ensured travel plans to a great extent. Can I stay without travelling? No. Is this problem temporary? It may be. Or, yes. I do not know. Even if I were to detail out a chart of the pros and cons of taking a significant leap as such, rest assured, the facts weigh heavier on the pros’ side as compared to the cons’. Nonetheless, there is still a severe reconsideration, given the What’s Next? situation doesn’t work out as planned. Sure, I do have a hefty bucket list comprising of all that I wish to do once I quit my job; a lot of it rides on the fact that I push myself enough to utilise my time effectively, and utilise it to do the things that I want to actually do. Will I be able to do that? The initial phases maybe tough no doubt, but then again given the right push, why not? To quote Munna Bhai’s concept from the well-known Bollywood movie, Lage Raho Munna Bhai, “Dimaag mein chemical locha hai boss”.
Naturally, there are a few items that I am positively sure about. At the outset, I have been associated with this business for almost four years now. Even though I like my job, I don’t see myself associating with this industry. Right from the concepts to the offerings and domains and its subs, the extremely business-minded mindsets to the unlimited thirst for technology enablement and advancement doesn’t appeal to me. Simply put, that’s not the side I resonate with. Clearly, I would very much like to move out of this industry. In this wake, am I overlooking the opportunity to work with some wonderful people that may have been? Possibly I am. Considering the sluggishness in the current vocation, I see it neither growing linearly, nor know what’s in store; at the end of each day, it leaves me with a dissatisfied and anxious mind along with a feeling of spending a day on doing something not-so-good, leave alone great. Adding to these pile of facts, not to forget the fact that this is something that’s lingered onto my head for a while now – I’ve been wondering what would it be like, for once, if you were left at your liberty to not only pan out your day, but also in a way that you want to?
An analogy I can link this whole experience to springs to my mind at this point. One of the recent most travel diaries we recorded was the trip to Kashmir. In the leg of our journey, we happened to visit a town that houses a lake, a spot that is yet unexploited by mankind. One of a kind of an experience that is now engraved within us for a long, long time to come, this ongoing anticipation is no different than living Tulian all over. Mind you, there was a point when we almost gave up seeing the physical discomfort caused to us during the climb. It was our guide who encouraged us to move on and not let the last ten steps go in vain. And did that journey pay off big time! It has been almost two months since we lived that beauty live, and I am not surprised that I can still recall that day vividly, especially the condition in which we returned to the hotel. Today, all that of the memories that stays with us is Abdul Rahman, the guide :: etched; Mastaan, the pony :: etched; the endless to and fro horse ride :: know how it is now; the experience :: etched; the lake :: etched for a long, long time to come; saddle sore :: forgotten; body pain and tiredness :: disappeared; lack of sleep :: no more due to the same reason; and finally, the worth of stalling the local driver’s decision to sightsee commercial areas :: priceless.
Do I dare jumping this time? Is this yet another darr ke aage jeet hai moment?